Writing Your Loved Ones A ‘When I’m Gone’ List

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Bereavement is a tough topic for people to discuss with their loved ones – but if your partner who looks after the finances dies, do you know what to do?

The truth is few families are prepared for the inevitable and prefer to ignore the facts until the worst happens.

Then they struggle to unravel a financial web while coping with grief and all the other issues that come with a bereavement.

Tragically, only one in four families are prepared to carry on with a ‘when I’m gone’ list even though many more have dealt with administering a loved one’s estate.

The list can be a few sheets of paper or a detailed file, depending on the wealth of your loved one.

What to put on your list

Here are some suggestions of what to include on the ‘when I’m gone’ list:

Your will

This is a vital document for everyone which lays out how you want your wealth to be divided among those you love. Only 40% of us have a will and a quarter of them are aged over 55 years old.

If you are not married to your partner, a will becomes even more important for their financial security.

Looking after children

You need to discuss this with your children and those you trust to become their guardians should you and your partner die. Appoint guardians in your will.

Compile your ‘when I’m gone’ list

Put your funeral wishes and financial information, such as bank details here and don’t forget to include usernames and passwords for digital accounts. Don’t forget pets – If you have pets, remember to arrange for friends or family to look after them.

Arrange your funeral

The cost of a funeral can be expensive and weigh heavily on the finances of the newly bereaved. The average cost is around £3,800. Let your family know your wishes about the funeral.

Talk about your last wishes

Financial firm Royal London has published a ‘when I’m gone’ list template’ with some helpful information.

Louise Eaton-Terry, a funeral expert at Royal London, said: “Talking about death isn’t always easy, but having plans in place will lessen the financial impact and make things a little bit easier for those you leave behind. While planning can seem daunting, you can start by simply having a conversation with your loved ones about your last wishes.”

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